The Bell

I sit here wondering why I came. What purpose I have for being here. My gut says, 'You'll learn something.' But my brain says, 'You know you won't.' My mind wanders to things I could be doing. Creating waves of color on the sidewalk only to be washed away by water. Washed away like my hope of gaining anything from here. My heart thinks I should just walk away... But my brain knows I could never do it. All I need is a ringing bell, to be free and to change te direction of the day. The warm day outside. The sun whispering to my soul to come outside and mingle with it's rays. But I just can't do it. It's not safe yet... But soon very soon. I just have to wait for the bell... 

Someday...

Someday...

I want that. 

To talk about my life.

The ups 

the downs, 

the CRAZY,

and Everything! 

The UNKNOWN

With these upcoming days, my anxiety GROWS!

The place where I have spent my life growing and learning is soon going to be my past. 

My world will flipped sideways and I'll have to jump over the edge! 

I only want to peek over the edge but    GRAVITY is taking over and I'm falling head first into the unknown. 

 I can see what I'm falling into but that doesn't make it any less scary.